October 2025 Update
“Blessed are those Whose blood and judgment are so well commeddled* That they are not a pipe for Fortune's finger To sound what stop she please. Give me that man That is not passion's slave, and I will wear him In my heart's core, ay, in my heart of heart.”
*mixed together
— Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act 3 Scene 2
“Days feel like the perfect length Don't need 'em any longer But for goodness’ sake do the years Seem way too short for my soul, corazón.”
— Overcompensate by Twenty-One Pilots
The school year came on fast and I am never prepared. But we are dealing as best we can and I have done a little writing so it's fine. I do love fall weather, but every weekend has been busy so it has been hard to enjoy it. Steinbeck wrote in the East of Eden letters that he had no 'even keel,' and I identify with that very much. I don't know if it would make me a better writer to be less up and down emotionally, but it would probably make me a more productive one. Consistency is overrated, maybe.
Writing
I started drafting a whole new project and it is going about as well as I could hope. Has been very humbling. I get on such a high when I am doing polish edits, thinking I might be pretty decent at this, and then drafting plunges me back down. I expected it though. There are no good first drafts. The drafting has been quite fun though, since it is a different project and it feels much lighter.
Music
I have been somewhat grumpy because my stupid wrist has still not healed all the way. Strained it opening a jar of salsa and I keep picking up the guitar before it is healed all the way. I think it is better? I just need to hold out a little longer. Guitar is such an emotional release for me that it has been pretty frustrating to not be able to do it for such a dumb reason. I do think I use guitar as a release/obsession, and it can take away from writing, but it is certainly a better obsession than video games or TV. Anyway I'll survive.
Reading
I read The Princess Bride and was nonplussed. I love the movie so much that I think it ruined the book for me. The snarky narrator thing is just not my thing. But the real highlight of September for me was King Lear. I re-read it after seeing it live, and I think it is my favorite Shakespeare, or at least the one that speaks to my life the most. It says everything about elder care and society and filial loyalty and parental tyranny and fortune's wheel that I've ever felt. Go read/watch it. Here's a quote from 3.7:
“Edgar:
Who alone suffers, suffers most in the mind,
Leaving free things and happy shows behind.
But then the mind much suffering doth overskip,
When grief hath mates and bearing fellowship.”
Listening
Twenty-One Pilots came out with a new album, as did Raye Zaragosa, so I have been listening to both of those on repeat all of September. Raye's album, Hold That Spirit came out first, and I really like it. The sound is a little more modern and electric than her last one, but she makes it work and it's cool to see her sound evolving. Garden, Sweetheart, Still Here, and the vocals on Bittersweet are probably the highlights for me. Then Breach came out, and Drum Show, Downstairs, and RAWFEAR, and Centermass and... As with all Twenty-One Pilots albums I like pretty much all the songs. The highlights of the album really just depend on which songs are going through the back of my mind at the given moment. We also got to see them in Hartford, and it was absolutely worth it. It's really something special to see an artist you love in person, and it gives me hope that a band as strange and eclectic as Twenty-One Pilots can make it big. Sometimes I feel like my art is too weird or depressing, and that I should try to cater to the Trend Machine if I want to make a living. I was feeling that pretty heavily this past week, and then we watched Lin-Manuel Miranda give a talk at my alma mater, and the interviewer asked him about his duty as an artist in a politically fraught time. Lin said your only duty is to “play to your muse” and make the art you want to make, and don't let anyone else tell you that you can't do it. And that's what I want to do.
Thank you for reading! I greatly regret that I will most likely never be able to meet you in person and shake your hand, but perhaps we can virtually shake hands via my newsletter, social media, or a cup of coffee sent over the wire. They are poor substitutes, but they can be a real grace in this intractable world.
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